Just pick one, already!

My Dearest Mother Nature,

I thank you so much for giving me a wonderful world to live in. I am a huge fan of your fall collections! The colors, the cool air, the crisp evenings. I just love it all. It is very hard for me to criticize you. After all, you have been doing this job for many, many years. You know your stuff.

However.... (you just knew that was coming, didn't you?)

I am not a huge fan of the gray hair that I constantly need to cover up, when it is combined with a pimply breakout so massive, so huge, of such epic proportions, that even scrawny A/V club teenagers are shirking away from me in horror. I feel that I have indeed put in my "dues" and I can live with the gray hair, but I cannot tolerate the nasty pustule filled sores. I am no longer a teenager; I am in fact a decade or so past teenybopper, and there for demand that you take back the teen skin that you have cursed me with this past week.

Gary hair or pimples. You can have one. Not both.

Sincerely,

Dayle

Who vastly prefers gray over a pimply forehead.