mine is not a better way, mine is merely another way
-Neale Donald Walsh
Around here we have a constant struggle for TV rights; who gets to watch TV on the flat screen in the living room. Some where along the lines the kids came up with the rule that if they all 3 cannot agree on a program that the TV must go off. I have no idea where they came up with that rule (certainly not from me yelling in sheer frustration "If you don't stop arguing the stupid thing is going OFF!!) We have 4 televisions in this house, and yet they still feel the need to argue!
But when Palmer comes home? All that stops! Why? Because dad is the king of the remote. Dad doesn't give a flying leap if you are desperate to find out if Hannah Montana will make it through her latest escapade, that remote, and thus Ultimate Power, belong to him.
All electronics fall under his jurisdiction.
Including headphones and ear buds. Palmer goes through them at an amazing rate, so he is always claiming other peoples. Last night he even claimed the last pair I had in the car dvd case! He goes thorough roughly a pair a month, because he tends to leave them laying around where Izzy can find them. And once Izzy gets a hold of a pair of headphones , they are done for! He pulls ear pieces off like other kids pull off wings on bugs. The rest of us have learned to hide our headphones from both Palmer and Izzy.
I've just learned to DVR what I want to watch then watch it later when they are all gone to school and work.
I think that makes me the winner in this battle!
A bright green lizard just crawled under my front door. He was about 6 inches long, and rather cute, so I instantly said "I shall name you Lizzy!But you can't stay here Lizzy, you must be an outdoor lizard, so out you go!"
I got a bowl and manila envelope to try and catch him. I decided I could put the bowl over him, slide the manila envelope under it, and take Lizzy back out side.
Lizzy didn't like that idea much, so he started up the wall, thus earning the notice of the giant ball of fur we call a dog.
(can you see where this is going?)
I'm tying to catch Lizzy. Furball is trying to EAT Lizzy and Lizzy does not want any of that. So Lizzy tries to make a break for it. Right at me. Now, I'm screeching in that girl meets spider/bug/insect voice, Furball is scrambling on the tile trying to catch the tasty green morsel that is getting away, Izzy is terribly excited by all the commotion, and Lizzy is making a mad dash for the toy box, which offers apparent lizard sanctuary.
I am, of course, in between the dog, the lizard, and the toy box. So I am dodging Lizzy, trying not to get barreled over by a giant ball of fur, and shrieking like a school girl. Lizzy makes it to the toy box, which just send Furball into a toy box knocking over tizzy of spasmodic proportions.
He catches the lizard.
Now I am yelling at the dog to let go of the lizard, and get the dog out of the house, so when he lets go, Lizzy can be free.
No such luck. Lizzy is no more.
I put Furball outside, just in case lizards don't digest well, if you know what I mean.
I walk back in, and Izzy hands me the still twitching tail of Lizzy. Just what every mother wants, a twitching lizard tail from their toddler. I'm just glad he didn't try to eat it.
This is my life, I swear to you, I could not make this up!
This is my life, I swear to you, I could not make this up!
Our 20th class reunion is coming up this weekend. Actually it our 19th year, but they are combining 1990 and 1991. We are not going, because I am just to spending that much money to fly six of us back to the other side of the country to see people that I haven't seen in 19 years, and frankly didn't like that much back then anyway!
Palmer was all for us attending the reunion, even to the point of making it a cross country family trip in the car. Um... NO. Those people that matter to me, I am in touch with all the time and miles apart don't factor in. The other people whom I haven't seen since the 10 year reunion aren't all that important in the scheme of my life, and if I really wanted to see them, I'd just Facebook them. And honestly, I don't remember much about my 10 year reunion anyway because I was on deaths door step at the time anyway. (Seriously, I nearly died and ended up in the hospital for a long time - but that is another story for another day)
Palmer has always been the type of person that remembers people. He'll say to me "remember that guy that we met 18 years ago at the party hosted by some other guy, and you only met them for maybe 3 minutes and have never seen them since, and why don't you remember them, how could you forget?" Or maybe I'm paraphrasing. Anyway, the point is Palmer remembers people who never even made a blip on my radar. He can meet a person and is instantly friends with them and thus has great legions of friends spread out all over the world. I, on the other hand, have a handful of friends and take a long time to let anyone into my "inner circle", but once you are there - you pretty much are never gonna get out unless you turn out to be some huge douchepickle.
But all this reunion talk has got me thinking about how long ago it was that I was in high school. I remember when MY parents went to their 20th reunion, and they were OLD people at the time. I am certainly not OLD and therefore cannot possibly be having my 10th class reunion. Wow! Did you catch the slip? I am in such denial that I typed 10th class reunion. See - There is no possible way I could be ready for my 20th!
Continuing in my "Let me tell you about where I've been" line of postings, I would like to tell you about Wishes Brew tea house in Hunters Creek.
I found Wishes Brew on line before I even moved to Florida, so I was very excited to go and have a cup of tea. I am a tea lover, and love to sit down with a hot cup of fragrant tea. The whole tea experience tends to be calming and spiritual to me.
I thought it would a fun experience for grandma, daughter-in-law, and grand daughter to go and have afternoon tea together. When we arrived, we ordered our tea and some food. My mother in law chose to have a chicken salad a croissant, I chose the turkey and cheddar sandwish (yes, they call them sandWISHES, which I thought was a cute play on the name) and my daughter got the kids pizza. Because it was so unbelievable hot that day, my mother in law and I ordered our tea in iced tea form, while my daughter got the hot chocolate. That's Kaitlyn for you - gotta be different!
When the brought our drinks... one at a time... 20 minutes after we ordered them, the brought us hot tea. My mother in law sent hers back, but I elected to not fuss with it and just kept mine hot. The teas were very good, and so was the hot chocolate. I have zero complaints about the tea portion of our time there what so ever.
The service how ever left a lot to be desired. Just like the drinks, none of our food was delivered at the same time. There was at least 5 minutes between each of our plates arriving. My mother in law did not get the croissant she ordered with her salad, until her salad was almost gone. And yes, she reminded the server... TWICE. After delivering my mother in law her salad, they then told me that thy did not have any turkey. I said ham was fine, and my sandwish was good, but certainly nothing that I couldn't have made for myself at home, for far less expense. My daughter's pizza was just a simple frozen pizza that had been stuck in the microwave and warmed up. And it appeared to be as tasty as it sounds.
Twenty minutes after we had finished eating, and had sat there with dirty dishes in front of us, I asked our server for the bill.
and waited
and waited
and waited
Thirty minutes later, I asked again.
and waited
and waited
and waited
Finally I asked another person for my bill, and told him that if I didn't have in 5 minutes I was walking out with out paying. And presto! My bill appeared. I did not tip them at all, and I was sure to write on the receipt that the service was terrible, and took nearly 45 minutes after the 1st time I asked for my bill for it to be delivered, so that management was sure to know.
So, the tea list was amazing; the tea was marvelous; the decor was warm and friendly; and the food was acceptable. However, no matter how much I enjoyed the tea and would like to try some of their other flavors of tea, I will not return simply because the service was atrocious.
My Dearest Mother Nature,
I thank you so much for giving me a wonderful world to live in. I am a huge fan of your fall collections! The colors, the cool air, the crisp evenings. I just love it all. It is very hard for me to criticize you. After all, you have been doing this job for many, many years. You know your stuff.
However.... (you just knew that was coming, didn't you?)
I am not a huge fan of the gray hair that I constantly need to cover up, when it is combined with a pimply breakout so massive, so huge, of such epic proportions, that even scrawny A/V club teenagers are shirking away from me in horror. I feel that I have indeed put in my "dues" and I can live with the gray hair, but I cannot tolerate the nasty pustule filled sores. I am no longer a teenager; I am in fact a decade or so past teenybopper, and there for demand that you take back the teen skin that you have cursed me with this past week.
Gary hair or pimples. You can have one. Not both.
Sincerely,
Dayle
Who vastly prefers gray over a pimply forehead.
When my mother-in-law was here, I was looking for things to do that we could do with her, which would be fun for the whole family and not break the bank. While she may think we are made of money, my pocket account knows otherwi9se, so I was determined to seek out the biggest bang for my buck, while keeping everyone from age 1 to age 10 happy. Not an easy thing to do!
I had driven past the sign to Arabian Nights dinner show many times, and something in me decided to give them a look on line. Their website promised a fabulous dinner, and a thrilling show. It was enough to intrigue me! The prices ($30.00 - $50.00) was within my budget for a nights entertainment, so I thought "Hey! Lets give this a shot!"
We went for the VIP tickets which got us each a drink (beer/wine for the grown ups, and a much more tame soda for the kids) before the show while we waited in the VIP area. There was a great stage out front with acrobats performing to help pass the time, and it really kept all the kids happy. Then our VIP tickets got us down on the arena floor before the performance, where some of the staff members told us about each breed of horse used in the show, and other staff members brought the horses out. After the little "show and tell" of horses, they let us roam the arena floor and go up to each of the horses. We got to pet them, ask the handlers questions, and the kids even got to sit on one of the horses. Izzy was totally mesmerized by the horses. I have to tell you, this was my favorite part of the night! I kind of thought that Izzy would be my only issue with going to a dinner show. But he was so taken with the horses, that there was none of the usual baby "I have sat here long enough and I am not going to sit here any more" antics!
After the VIP part, we went up to our seat for dinner. Seating is long bench style stadium seating, so there really isn't a bad seat in the house. I can see how if you had a bad back, the lack of a seat back could be bothersome, but it didn't bother any of us at all. Dinner was not fabulous, but it was quite tasty, and the portions were good sized. Desert was very yummy, and it was great that they gave us plenty of food to feed the baby as well as ourselves.
But we didn't go for the food, we went to see the show. It was spectacular. When I call it mesmerizing, I truly mean that every one of us could not take our eyes off the horses and their riders. The tricks were amazing! Bare back riding! Acrobatics! Jumping through fire hoops! All of it was just breathtaking. I can only imagine the thrill the riders must feel being able to control such magnificent animals. Truly, it made me want to take up horse back riding!
All in all - it was a great show, and I can't wait to take my parents and grandparents when they come this winter.
**I have to admit, this is not my picture. My camera acted up so none of my pictures turned out as I had hoped they would. I freely admit to borrowing this one off the website. **
All better! I trimmed those frayed edges and I am back to my bouncy self! It is amazing what a day with the family at Disney World can do! See, it really is the Magical Kingdom! I thought for sure after chasing a toddler, a husband and 4 kids (yes 4 - Tyler brought his girlfriend Melissa with us) all over the park, I would be sore today. But, other than my arm muscle being a bit tight from doing a lot of Izzy holding, I don't have a sore spot on my body, not even my feet! Can I get a woot woot?
I'm very proud of Tyler. He was nominated to be a student ambassador next summer. We have completed the application process, and are waiting on the interview. But if he is finally selected, he will head to the UK next summer. He was the only student in his school nominated, and one of out of 100 in the entire Orlando area. It was not based on grades (thankfully - because he is not a straight A student), but based on merit, citizenship, and behavior. I knew he was a special kid, and it does my heart warm to know that others feel the same way!
Not to mention that it is nice to know that he behaves well when he is not under the watchful eye of his mom!
All morning long I have been rambling around, not feeling like doing any of my usual routine. I have things that I need to do each day to keep my house, my life, in order. Not to mention the outside work that I do to bring in a little income. I just can't seem to wrap my head around any of it today.
The thought that keeps coming to me is "frayed". I feel frayed around the edges. Just a little worn down, and no longer the crisp fresh person I was. Like all those tiny little things that really don't amount to much have slowly started to erode over time. Those itty bitty pieces just seemingly bump into to me, then fall off without seemingly have left a mark. But if you look close you will see that each one of those little life issues have taken out a small little chunk of me until I am just a soft blur, not the crisp focused person I used to be.
The thought that keeps coming to me is "frayed". I feel frayed around the edges. Just a little worn down, and no longer the crisp fresh person I was. Like all those tiny little things that really don't amount to much have slowly started to erode over time. Those itty bitty pieces just seemingly bump into to me, then fall off without seemingly have left a mark. But if you look close you will see that each one of those little life issues have taken out a small little chunk of me until I am just a soft blur, not the crisp focused person I used to be.
We have giant cranes that come through the back almost every day. They stand between 4 1/2 and 5 feet tall. They stick their long beaks into the ground to eat worms and bugs. They have a very loud distinctive cry. Izzy is totally fascinated by them. So when they came by this morning (we generally see them in the afternoon, so he was super excited) we went out to the pool area and watched them. Bryce loves to throw them crackers or bread crusts. I'm a tad intimidated by their long wicked very sharp looking beaks, so I prefer to stand inside the screened pool area. Izzy would be out chasing them down if he could.
Coming back into the house I noticed some black hairy legs hanging over the top of the patio door. I slid it all the way open, and giant (ok, moderately big) hairy spider popped over the top at me. Ever since I found a spider here in the Florida with the body the size of my cell phone (kid you not! It would have given Godzilla a run for his money) I have had to readjust my descriptive of a giant spider. I have a thing about spiders - there is no such thing as a good spider - they all deserve to be squashed flat, generally while I am screaming and squealing like a little girl. The damn hairy beast is in an area I can't reach a shoe, and I sure as hell don't want him jumping down on me while I try to whack him. So I'm not doing anything about him... Except keep checking on the door to be DAMN SURE he is on the outside, and doesn't find some fiendish way to get over onto my side. I know I will have spider nightmares tonight. I already have a major case of "willies".
Coming back into the house I noticed some black hairy legs hanging over the top of the patio door. I slid it all the way open, and giant (ok, moderately big) hairy spider popped over the top at me. Ever since I found a spider here in the Florida with the body the size of my cell phone (kid you not! It would have given Godzilla a run for his money) I have had to readjust my descriptive of a giant spider. I have a thing about spiders - there is no such thing as a good spider - they all deserve to be squashed flat, generally while I am screaming and squealing like a little girl. The damn hairy beast is in an area I can't reach a shoe, and I sure as hell don't want him jumping down on me while I try to whack him. So I'm not doing anything about him... Except keep checking on the door to be DAMN SURE he is on the outside, and doesn't find some fiendish way to get over onto my side. I know I will have spider nightmares tonight. I already have a major case of "willies".
I'm very beat down and tired this week. Rationally, I know that a large part of it is female issues, but that doesn't make it any easier. I've had some pretty messed up pipes the last several years, which made the conception of Izzy such a shock. For ten or eleven months after his birth I was regular as could be, but then the old "everything is messed up" crept back in, and I just had my 1st period in 3 months. That emotional roller coaster is a lot to take, never mind the shit your body puts you through. Palmer has been having some pretty severe allergic reactions to something - we don't know what yet - and because he is a man and doesn't do well with any form of illness or infirmary, he has been Crabby McCrabberson. Really? I don't want to be dealing with my own shit right now, I don't want to have to shoulder his too.
We are preparing to go on a little mini vacation. Five days at the beach. It should be fun, but the preparation is, of course, all on my shoulders. A family of six does not just up and leave. I have to plan 5 days worth of meals (we'll have a kitchenette, so we will be eating mostly at the resort), pack beach gear, pack groceries, pack clothes, get the dogs scheduled for boarding, AND still do my little part time work at home job, parent, clean, and all the zillion other things I do.
Frankly, I'm exhausted. And I just want to be left alone for a few hours.
(oh don't worry - I'm just having a poor me party - I'll be back to my Pollyanna self in a day or two. )
We are preparing to go on a little mini vacation. Five days at the beach. It should be fun, but the preparation is, of course, all on my shoulders. A family of six does not just up and leave. I have to plan 5 days worth of meals (we'll have a kitchenette, so we will be eating mostly at the resort), pack beach gear, pack groceries, pack clothes, get the dogs scheduled for boarding, AND still do my little part time work at home job, parent, clean, and all the zillion other things I do.
Frankly, I'm exhausted. And I just want to be left alone for a few hours.
(oh don't worry - I'm just having a poor me party - I'll be back to my Pollyanna self in a day or two. )
I just chased Izzy down and licked frosting off of his chubby little baby leg...
It is far less cannibalistic than it sounds. I swear.
In an effort to get out of the friggen house before I go completely insane, um I meant to say...
In an effort to get out of the house and start meeting people, I signed up to take a cake decorating class at a local cupcake bakery. Besides a weekly chance to get out of the house, meet some very nice people, and a chance to partake in some very tasty cupcakes (nom nom nom), I am also learning a very handy skill. Or at least I hope it will be a handy skill. I do love to bake, so decorating the things I love to bake could be fun.
Each week we need to bring our own butter cream frosting to class. (yummm, butter cream). So today I whipped up a batch, dyed it blue for fun, and let Izzy lick the spatula. Something he has never gotten to do before. Instant hit!
But then I noticed a dab of blue on his leg after I washed him all off.
So, of course, I chased him down, scooped him up, and licked his leg.
It is far less cannibalistic than it sounds. I swear.
In an effort to get out of the friggen house before I go completely insane, um I meant to say...
In an effort to get out of the house and start meeting people, I signed up to take a cake decorating class at a local cupcake bakery. Besides a weekly chance to get out of the house, meet some very nice people, and a chance to partake in some very tasty cupcakes (nom nom nom), I am also learning a very handy skill. Or at least I hope it will be a handy skill. I do love to bake, so decorating the things I love to bake could be fun.
Each week we need to bring our own butter cream frosting to class. (yummm, butter cream). So today I whipped up a batch, dyed it blue for fun, and let Izzy lick the spatula. Something he has never gotten to do before. Instant hit!
But then I noticed a dab of blue on his leg after I washed him all off.
So, of course, I chased him down, scooped him up, and licked his leg.
I'm sitting on my bed with my laptop on my lap, enjoying the thunder and lightning happening right outside my window, and I had to stop and take a moment to soak it all in.
This is my home. This is my weather. This is the place where our family will now write our story.
I haven't felt so "right" about anyting in a long time, as I do about making Florida our new home. It is not without its bumps in the road, but then there really are no "happily ever afters".
We are considering giving up one of our dogs. He's a husky chow mix, white and very beautiful. But we don't have a fenced back yard for him, and he must be on a chain if he is outside. That isn't good for him. And he is very protective over what he considers to be his. He took off after a little pomeranian the other day, and bit him, because the little guy dared to cross some invisible doggy line. We can't have him doing that. But once the shock of what happened wore off - Palmer and all the kids are right back in denial and think we should keep him. It is up to me to be the bad guy and find him a new home. It is going to make me one very unpopluar mother around here. But if Palmer won't do it, then I will put on the brass balls and get it done. One of us has to be the responsible one, and not let sentament about how much we love him get in the way.
I'm pretty sure Cinderella never had to worry about finding a home for the mice.
This is my home. This is my weather. This is the place where our family will now write our story.
I haven't felt so "right" about anyting in a long time, as I do about making Florida our new home. It is not without its bumps in the road, but then there really are no "happily ever afters".
We are considering giving up one of our dogs. He's a husky chow mix, white and very beautiful. But we don't have a fenced back yard for him, and he must be on a chain if he is outside. That isn't good for him. And he is very protective over what he considers to be his. He took off after a little pomeranian the other day, and bit him, because the little guy dared to cross some invisible doggy line. We can't have him doing that. But once the shock of what happened wore off - Palmer and all the kids are right back in denial and think we should keep him. It is up to me to be the bad guy and find him a new home. It is going to make me one very unpopluar mother around here. But if Palmer won't do it, then I will put on the brass balls and get it done. One of us has to be the responsible one, and not let sentament about how much we love him get in the way.
I'm pretty sure Cinderella never had to worry about finding a home for the mice.
Nothing beats going to Sonic for ice cream at 9 pm, just because it is a Wednesday.
That is all.
That is all.
Our 4th of July came and went without much fanfair.
We were going to head up north a bit to see Chickie and her family, but Mother Nature decided to cancel those plans for us. Rainy bitch.
So this was our 1st big holiday where the realiziaton of no family or friends nearby really hit home. I could tell that it really bothered Palmer, who has always been the more social of the two of us. And by bother him - I ment he was Crabby McCrabberson. He seemed to take each and every raindrop as a personal insult. So much so that by the time that we left to the local lake to maybe catch some fireworks - he was so grouchy, that for a few seconds I considered attaching him to several dozen fireworks, and launching him into space.
I know that the move is hard on all of us, and we are just really missing our Nevada friends, but this 4th wasn't much of a celebration at all.
We were going to head up north a bit to see Chickie and her family, but Mother Nature decided to cancel those plans for us. Rainy bitch.
So this was our 1st big holiday where the realiziaton of no family or friends nearby really hit home. I could tell that it really bothered Palmer, who has always been the more social of the two of us. And by bother him - I ment he was Crabby McCrabberson. He seemed to take each and every raindrop as a personal insult. So much so that by the time that we left to the local lake to maybe catch some fireworks - he was so grouchy, that for a few seconds I considered attaching him to several dozen fireworks, and launching him into space.
I know that the move is hard on all of us, and we are just really missing our Nevada friends, but this 4th wasn't much of a celebration at all.
My mother-in-law has left. I have recuperated from her visit. My house is once again in order and calmness now prevails. Time for a deep sigh.
ahhhhhhhhhhh
There, now didn't that feel better?
Why, yes. Yes, it did.
Now that things are back to normal (or what passes for normal around here) I am spending the day baking cookies for the new neighbors who have moved in today a few houses down. I know that they are working their tushes off unloading the u-haul truck in a really hot and humid day. Wouldn't it be a nice treat to have a few homemade chocolate chip cookies dropped by?
Yeah, I thought so too.
It's very important to me that we go over and welcome the new neighbors to the 'hood, because when we moved in no one welcomed us. We have been here a few months, and we still don't know our neighbors. That is a complete turn around from Vegas, where we knew everyone in the neighborhood, and everyone was very friendly and welcoming. I'm not sure if it is just the neighbors around here of a southern thing, but we just haven't found a lot of friendly people around here.
And that is a sad thing. A very sad thing.
ahhhhhhhhhhh
There, now didn't that feel better?
Why, yes. Yes, it did.
Now that things are back to normal (or what passes for normal around here) I am spending the day baking cookies for the new neighbors who have moved in today a few houses down. I know that they are working their tushes off unloading the u-haul truck in a really hot and humid day. Wouldn't it be a nice treat to have a few homemade chocolate chip cookies dropped by?
Yeah, I thought so too.
It's very important to me that we go over and welcome the new neighbors to the 'hood, because when we moved in no one welcomed us. We have been here a few months, and we still don't know our neighbors. That is a complete turn around from Vegas, where we knew everyone in the neighborhood, and everyone was very friendly and welcoming. I'm not sure if it is just the neighbors around here of a southern thing, but we just haven't found a lot of friendly people around here.
And that is a sad thing. A very sad thing.
Just a quick pop in to let you know that I am still entertaining the Mother in Law, and will return once she is gone on Tuesday!
My crazy mother in law arrived last night. (Yes the same one who thinks she loaded Palmer 5 grand when he was TWELVE)
If you are reading this, send help in the form of pills, booze, ear plugs, what ever you got to help me get through the next two weeks.
Or else, I'm afraid I slowly descend into madness...
Ok, no slowly about it - I'm in a fast car and heading straight there.
If you are reading this, send help in the form of pills, booze, ear plugs, what ever you got to help me get through the next two weeks.
Or else, I'm afraid I slowly descend into madness...
Ok, no slowly about it - I'm in a fast car and heading straight there.
Dear Weatherman
Considering your grossly inaccurate forcasting skills and complete lack of regard for anything remotely related to the truth, I regret to inform you that I can no longer continue this toxic relationship.
Oh yes, I wanted to believe you. I wanted to do just what you said. "Today will be beautiful, the perfect day to spend outdoors, before the summer really hits" You said. I was seduced by your words. I thought, how can you, MY weatherman, lead me astray? Haven't you always had my very best weather well-being at heart?
So I planned my day.
I put on those cute denim capris that are a little warmer and less "breathing" than shorts
I went out to enjoy my day.
The day that YOU promised would be a perfect 92 degrees, with barely any humidity and not a drop of rain to pester those fluffy white clouds.
You. LIAR.
Those perfect clouds were black and heavy. That air that was supposed to remind me of my native DRY desert - was horrid, humid, and sticky
My cute denim capris - MISERABLE hot.
I listened to you, and you broke my heart... or at least made me break a sweat.
So screw you, Mr. Fox Weatherman.
SCREW YOU
Considering your grossly inaccurate forcasting skills and complete lack of regard for anything remotely related to the truth, I regret to inform you that I can no longer continue this toxic relationship.
Oh yes, I wanted to believe you. I wanted to do just what you said. "Today will be beautiful, the perfect day to spend outdoors, before the summer really hits" You said. I was seduced by your words. I thought, how can you, MY weatherman, lead me astray? Haven't you always had my very best weather well-being at heart?
So I planned my day.
I put on those cute denim capris that are a little warmer and less "breathing" than shorts
I went out to enjoy my day.
The day that YOU promised would be a perfect 92 degrees, with barely any humidity and not a drop of rain to pester those fluffy white clouds.
You. LIAR.
Those perfect clouds were black and heavy. That air that was supposed to remind me of my native DRY desert - was horrid, humid, and sticky
My cute denim capris - MISERABLE hot.
I listened to you, and you broke my heart... or at least made me break a sweat.
So screw you, Mr. Fox Weatherman.
SCREW YOU
Dear Boring Webinar Company,
After an extensive and exhaustive polling process (aka talking to my friend) we (well,I - but we sounds so much more official) have determined that your webinars are extremely dull and dry. But don't dispare! (a little added drama to get them on the hook) Dayle's Webinar Enhancement Services are here! (Catchy business title, no?) For a nominal fee (and by nominal I mean write me a great big fat check) DWES (hum, that sounds like a radio station. I may have to change the name) can enhance your webinars so that your target audience (my friend) is no longer disinterested (reduced to tears) about viewing your webinars. You may choose from one or more (more! Choose more! so I can charge more!) of the following webinar enhancements;
Fun narrator voices. (My hubby is pretty good at funny voices) Nothing says pay attention to me like a webinar read by Arnold Schwarzenegger, or a kooky french accent, or the sexy latin lover. Or even Elmer Fudd! After all the very word "webinar" is right up Elmer's alley.
Or you could have a host of fun animated characters (stick figures drawn by yours truly) who pop up from time to time during the webinar process. Perhaps a little mouse who will make fun balloon animals in the bottom corner of the screen. Or the bowlegged cowboy who swaggers across the screen just to shoot holes in the webinar. Or my favorite - the little old lady who give the finger (no doubt what your poor webinar viewers have wanted to do to you!)
Or the "sound enhancement" package, including farts, burps, and various other and sometimes unidentifiable body sounds (I intend to follow my sons around with a microphone... an hour should yield enough sounds for several webinars)
Sincerely,
Dayle (who has way to much time on her hands, and should be cleaning rather than making up fake letters to companies)
After an extensive and exhaustive polling process (aka talking to my friend) we (well,I - but we sounds so much more official) have determined that your webinars are extremely dull and dry. But don't dispare! (a little added drama to get them on the hook) Dayle's Webinar Enhancement Services are here! (Catchy business title, no?) For a nominal fee (and by nominal I mean write me a great big fat check) DWES (hum, that sounds like a radio station. I may have to change the name) can enhance your webinars so that your target audience (my friend) is no longer disinterested (reduced to tears) about viewing your webinars. You may choose from one or more (more! Choose more! so I can charge more!) of the following webinar enhancements;
Fun narrator voices. (My hubby is pretty good at funny voices) Nothing says pay attention to me like a webinar read by Arnold Schwarzenegger, or a kooky french accent, or the sexy latin lover. Or even Elmer Fudd! After all the very word "webinar" is right up Elmer's alley.
Or you could have a host of fun animated characters (stick figures drawn by yours truly) who pop up from time to time during the webinar process. Perhaps a little mouse who will make fun balloon animals in the bottom corner of the screen. Or the bowlegged cowboy who swaggers across the screen just to shoot holes in the webinar. Or my favorite - the little old lady who give the finger (no doubt what your poor webinar viewers have wanted to do to you!)
Or the "sound enhancement" package, including farts, burps, and various other and sometimes unidentifiable body sounds (I intend to follow my sons around with a microphone... an hour should yield enough sounds for several webinars)
Sincerely,
Dayle (who has way to much time on her hands, and should be cleaning rather than making up fake letters to companies)
The big 3 got out of school last week. Today marks the start of a summer at home with them. I'm looking at this with a mixture of dread and excitement. Last summer we were in Vegas. They had friends and were busy constantly. Now we are in our new home. We don't know any of our neighbors, none of them seem to have kids.
I have visions of this summer being wonderful, with it being just the family. Of the kids finding out that their siblings can be friends too, and all of us swimming, and playing games, and watching cartoons together on the couch in a big puppy pile.
And maybe we will all start a singing group and I'll make us all matching outfits out of the curtains, and we'll be just like the VonTrapp family.
The reality is that they will be chomping at the bit soon to "go do something" because they are "bored" and there is "nothing to do".
Sigh
I have visions of this summer being wonderful, with it being just the family. Of the kids finding out that their siblings can be friends too, and all of us swimming, and playing games, and watching cartoons together on the couch in a big puppy pile.
And maybe we will all start a singing group and I'll make us all matching outfits out of the curtains, and we'll be just like the VonTrapp family.
The reality is that they will be chomping at the bit soon to "go do something" because they are "bored" and there is "nothing to do".
Sigh
Tyler is all about the food. He's forever planning his next meal. He could be eating lunch, and he's already thinking about dinner. What can I say - the boy is a teen! (on a side note... & Palmer wonders why our grocery bill is going up? Really? Does he not realize the kid has grown 3 inches this year?)
Tyler constantly suggests that we go out to eat "as a family". I think he believes if he phrases his request as though he really wants to spend quality time with his family then we just can't resist. Somehow, I am supposed to believe that even though he was just fighting like cats and dogs with his sister, he really would like to break bread with her. Riiiiight. And it has nothing to do with the TGIFridays commercial he just watched.
But on the plus side, since he is always starving, he is interested in all aspects of food. It has been a wonderful chance to teach him how to plan meals, grocery shop on a budget, and cook. Oh, yes, the cooking! If I so much as rattle a pan, he pops his shaggy head into the kitchen and asks if he can help. This week alone I have taught him how to make biscuits, pound cake, and beef burgundy. I am proud to say that his cooking lessons have stuck with him. Last summer, when he spent some time with his Grandma and Papa, he wanted to make them a meal. So he went to the store, planned all his purchases (Grandma footed the bill of course) and made them dinner. He didn't take the easy road and make them hot dogs either. Nope my sweet boy made Pasta Carbonara with basil.
That's MY boy!
Tyler constantly suggests that we go out to eat "as a family". I think he believes if he phrases his request as though he really wants to spend quality time with his family then we just can't resist. Somehow, I am supposed to believe that even though he was just fighting like cats and dogs with his sister, he really would like to break bread with her. Riiiiight. And it has nothing to do with the TGIFridays commercial he just watched.
But on the plus side, since he is always starving, he is interested in all aspects of food. It has been a wonderful chance to teach him how to plan meals, grocery shop on a budget, and cook. Oh, yes, the cooking! If I so much as rattle a pan, he pops his shaggy head into the kitchen and asks if he can help. This week alone I have taught him how to make biscuits, pound cake, and beef burgundy. I am proud to say that his cooking lessons have stuck with him. Last summer, when he spent some time with his Grandma and Papa, he wanted to make them a meal. So he went to the store, planned all his purchases (Grandma footed the bill of course) and made them dinner. He didn't take the easy road and make them hot dogs either. Nope my sweet boy made Pasta Carbonara with basil.
That's MY boy!
I got my 1st real put two arms around my neck and squeeze hug from Izzy today. It thrilled me to my very toes that his sweet little baby arms were giving me love.
It is also sad, because I don't remember my 1st baby hugs from the big 3. Now granted, they are so much older than Izzy and time has passed; those little things get swept from your memories.
A friend asked me the other day how was it different now, being a mom of a baby in my 30's, as opposed to being a mom in my 20's. It is so much different. The 1st time around I was young and inexperienced. I was still learning who I was, and suddenly I had to learn who I was WITH children. I may have had more energy in my 20's, but I have so much more wisdom in my 30's. I am a completely different person, and have a much more relaxed approach to parenting than I did then.
The neat thing about there being 8 years between babies, it is like being a new mom all over again, with out the pressure, worry, and anxiety of being a new mom. Enough time has passed that the firsts are all new and exciting again.
I may not have planned Izzy, but I would never change having him for the world.
It is also sad, because I don't remember my 1st baby hugs from the big 3. Now granted, they are so much older than Izzy and time has passed; those little things get swept from your memories.
A friend asked me the other day how was it different now, being a mom of a baby in my 30's, as opposed to being a mom in my 20's. It is so much different. The 1st time around I was young and inexperienced. I was still learning who I was, and suddenly I had to learn who I was WITH children. I may have had more energy in my 20's, but I have so much more wisdom in my 30's. I am a completely different person, and have a much more relaxed approach to parenting than I did then.
The neat thing about there being 8 years between babies, it is like being a new mom all over again, with out the pressure, worry, and anxiety of being a new mom. Enough time has passed that the firsts are all new and exciting again.
I may not have planned Izzy, but I would never change having him for the world.
Yesterday was a very bad day for me. I was having a day where I was sick of staying at home, practically no contact with the outside world, since I had no internet. No one to call. I love my family, and I love being with them... but sometimes they are just to much, and I need to get out and not be "mom" all the time. Having gone through several years of pretty bad depression, I dread those days more than I can express. So when I have a bad day - I warn everyone off.
Hey, I'm crabby today so just stay out of my way and get along!
But the kids didn't want to listen. I told them when they got home from school it didn't seem to matter to them. Rather than jumping up and offering to help or taking my advise and getting out of my way, they just continued to cling on to me, or bicker with each other.
And it wasn't helped by Mr. Its-ok-for-me-to-be-a-crabby-dickhead-but-how-dare-you-be-anything-less-than-pleasant who asked me "Have I done something to piss you off? No? Then what the hell is your problem? If you are in such a bad mood, why don't you just go away."
Yes, that just sent me over the edge. He gets to go to work everyday. He gets to get out and talk to people, and see more than just this house. For pity sake - he can't stand to stay home one full day on his days off, yet he expects me to do it full time and never get bored of it.
I do love staying home, but some days I just need to see further than my mailbox.
Hey, I'm crabby today so just stay out of my way and get along!
But the kids didn't want to listen. I told them when they got home from school it didn't seem to matter to them. Rather than jumping up and offering to help or taking my advise and getting out of my way, they just continued to cling on to me, or bicker with each other.
And it wasn't helped by Mr. Its-ok-for-me-to-be-a-crabby-dickhead-but-how-dare-you-be-anything-less-than-pleasant who asked me "Have I done something to piss you off? No? Then what the hell is your problem? If you are in such a bad mood, why don't you just go away."
Yes, that just sent me over the edge. He gets to go to work everyday. He gets to get out and talk to people, and see more than just this house. For pity sake - he can't stand to stay home one full day on his days off, yet he expects me to do it full time and never get bored of it.
I do love staying home, but some days I just need to see further than my mailbox.
Something happened this past weekend that has gotten me so livid, it has taken me this long to cool off to be able to write about it.
Some back ground 1st. When Palmer took the promotion that moved us to Orlando, he also got a raise. Just out of habit, we do not discuss financial issues with family. Especially things like salary. The moment he told his mother about the move, she began hinting around about how much he was making. Snide little comments like "You will have so much money now, that you won't know what to do with it all". Yes, Palmer makes good money. It allows us to live in a nice house (but not a grand house), it allows us to drive a nice car (but we only have one), and it allows me to stay at home with the kids (but I did work for years - and me staying home took us over a year of financial planning and cutting back - hence the one car!), and, lets not forget that we are raising 4 kids - which is not cheep! Oh yeah, and we do plan to actually retire someday! But as soon as we announced our move, she started planning her move in with us. NOT that she was invited. But all of a sudden she is now "going blind" (yet she continues to drive? I thought that for sure you couldn't drive if you were going blind) and she on the verge of dying of a heart murmur, (one that she has had all her life) and she outright TOLD us that we need to buy her a condo in Florida so she can be with us. All the while, she was bad mouthing us to her best friend, who happens to know my mother, and the best friend then proceeded to lecture MY mother on all the evils that Palmer and I do to MIL.
Oh yes, I have issues with MIL. They are many, and they are deep.
So anyway....
My MIL called Palmer on Sunday and told him "remember that TEN GRAND I loaned you - I need it back." Palmer and I were just floored. WHAT 10 grand? She said that she had 3 10K savings bonds from her mother, Palmer’s grandma. I know that was true. But she says that she cashed one and gave Palmer 5k and gave her sister, Palmers Aunt, 5k. Then a few years later, cashed one again - gave Palmer 5k, and gave Palmers Aunt the other 5. But I remember when she cashed one. She did give Palmers Aunt half, but she used the other half. Palmer and I never saw any of it, nor did we expect to. Get this... the 1st time she said she cashed one and gave Palmer the money... TWENTY FIVE years ago.
Yes, that's right.
25.
Years.
Ago.
That would make Palmer 12 when she supposedly gave him 5 grand. The second time was supposedly around 14 years ago. That would be right when
Excuse me BITCH, you call and want money, make up some cock and bull story to get it (or maybe in her mind she really thinks we did - that is always a possibility with her) and then slander my name? All this days before she is being flown out here on OUR DIME to come visit her grand kids???
That's it!
I've had it!
I'm taking the day off!
I'm gonna see if anyone notices I didn't mop their stick off the floors.
I didn't wipe their toothpaste off the bathroom sink.
I didn't tidy their beds.
And I didn't pick up after their messy selves.
There has been a little to much taking mom for granted around here. The only one exempt from the mom strike is little Izzy who loves and appreciates everything I do; and shows it with lots of drooly slopply wet kisses, and the sweeties little baby hugs.
The rest of them can fend for themselves in their dirty squalled bedrooms.
I've had it!
I'm taking the day off!
I'm gonna see if anyone notices I didn't mop their stick off the floors.
I didn't wipe their toothpaste off the bathroom sink.
I didn't tidy their beds.
And I didn't pick up after their messy selves.
There has been a little to much taking mom for granted around here. The only one exempt from the mom strike is little Izzy who loves and appreciates everything I do; and shows it with lots of drooly slopply wet kisses, and the sweeties little baby hugs.
The rest of them can fend for themselves in their dirty squalled bedrooms.
Tonight in the living room:
Bryce and Kaitlyn are laughing hysterically over (probably) nothing.
Palmer: Stop pointing and laughing at me! You're mother does that every time I'm naked!
Bryce and Kaitlyn: Even more hysterical laughing
Bryce and Kaitlyn are laughing hysterically over (probably) nothing.
Palmer: Stop pointing and laughing at me! You're mother does that every time I'm naked!
Bryce and Kaitlyn: Even more hysterical laughing
Perhaps I should tell you, I am a naturally curly mop head.
When I was little, I had stunningly beautiful long blond ringlets. The kind that are glossy and bouncy, and complete strangers would come up just to touch my head, and spring my curls.
But somewhere along the way, my hair changed. It darkened to a blah brown, and my perfect ringlets became unruly, frizzy, and as I like to call it, Brillo pad head.
Add in gray hair, which we don't talk about and cover with hair dye the second they show their nasty gray heads... well - it is not pretty, let me tell you.
So now that I have added a climate with near constant humidity issues, I'm even frizzier.
Any brave hairdressers out there willing to take on a hot mess?
When I was little, I had stunningly beautiful long blond ringlets. The kind that are glossy and bouncy, and complete strangers would come up just to touch my head, and spring my curls.
But somewhere along the way, my hair changed. It darkened to a blah brown, and my perfect ringlets became unruly, frizzy, and as I like to call it, Brillo pad head.
Add in gray hair, which we don't talk about and cover with hair dye the second they show their nasty gray heads... well - it is not pretty, let me tell you.
So now that I have added a climate with near constant humidity issues, I'm even frizzier.
Any brave hairdressers out there willing to take on a hot mess?
Ok, so that may be a bit of an obscure literary reference to start a blog with, but I just couldn't come up with anything else!
This isn't my 1st foray into the blogging world. It isn't even my second! But I just can't find myself staying away from writing the little things that float around in my head so I'm back!
Let me introduce myself and the cast of characters around here.
I'm Dayle. Wife, mom, daughter, sister, aunt, avid reader, dog owner, and yet none of those things define who I am. Hell, I'm still learning who I am - so how can I tell you?
Palmer - he's my husband. My main squeeze. My best friend. The person who can annoy me the most. I love him dearly, but expect a lot of me making fun of him. Because he just provides so darn much blog fodder, how can I help it?
Tyler - My oldest son. We've been through a lot with him; he has had 6 surgeries and I'm always worried about him.
Kaitlyn - my daughter. The only girl. She's going to be the death of me.
Bryce - My next son. For the longest time he was the baby. He is the sweet one of the bunch. Always willing to help and keep the peace.
Izzy - my surprise baby! Eight years after my Bryce, he showed up and shocked us all. He's a joy and a delight.
As for my blog title. Well I'm a Las Vegas mom who just picked up her family and moved across country to Orlando. Talk about a culture shock.
This isn't my 1st foray into the blogging world. It isn't even my second! But I just can't find myself staying away from writing the little things that float around in my head so I'm back!
Let me introduce myself and the cast of characters around here.
I'm Dayle. Wife, mom, daughter, sister, aunt, avid reader, dog owner, and yet none of those things define who I am. Hell, I'm still learning who I am - so how can I tell you?
Palmer - he's my husband. My main squeeze. My best friend. The person who can annoy me the most. I love him dearly, but expect a lot of me making fun of him. Because he just provides so darn much blog fodder, how can I help it?
Tyler - My oldest son. We've been through a lot with him; he has had 6 surgeries and I'm always worried about him.
Kaitlyn - my daughter. The only girl. She's going to be the death of me.
Bryce - My next son. For the longest time he was the baby. He is the sweet one of the bunch. Always willing to help and keep the peace.
Izzy - my surprise baby! Eight years after my Bryce, he showed up and shocked us all. He's a joy and a delight.
As for my blog title. Well I'm a Las Vegas mom who just picked up her family and moved across country to Orlando. Talk about a culture shock.
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